page 141

why does love disparage me still?

in my feeble attempts to unveil
more truths possessed to its name,
love contends to make yet another
mockery
of one of its children.

my ego---lapsed
from the embrace of its being.

why does love disparage me still?


:::


the young girl who is Dawn,

she holds in her bosom
the stillness of Night
and the light of Hope's infantile fortune.


:::


i cannot think how helpless i am
in my defense against this moment...

the waiter is whistling to himself in this diner,
and i am hopeless against deafening his song;

the moment takes me along
the folds of his tongue
with what carries across his lips.

so suddenly, i have returned to the present;
it recognizes me like an old friend.


:::


amid the ceaseless flexing
and partitioning of spacetime,
i was approached by a star.

this star held in her face
the violence of the Big Bang,
and the serenity of illuminated resilience.

long ago did she escape
the safe asylum of the nebula
to bare witness to the debauchery
of the universe.

and here she was,
the most brilliant object circumventing my gravity---
until a planet stole her ever more closely.

i thought,
two stars that collide create a black hole;

together, we can birth a galaxy.

so, i will sit on the ledge of the Milky Way
for her return.


:::


kick the embers!
they are still warm.

kick them forcefully
and one will catch
on the dry forest
surrounding us.

come back.

        witness this fire
        discover the wild
        in its wilderness.


:::


if love approached you on your path and said,

Lose me, and there, while lost,
I will be found.

how then would you set about your path?

hold onto love,
as you see it in front of you?

or let it go,
to find it again
in a more suitable form?


:::


commanded by the past.
encapsulated within trauma's truth.
banished from proper judgment.
broken by clarity's blindness.
all harbored within the eggshell of pain.

do remember...
they hold you inside,
but the shell was built
fragile enough to break.


:::


it is strong enough
to make us heed to danger,

yet it is weak enough
to heal in its entirety;

this is the paradox of pain.


:::


scarred. battered. bruised.
bare.
           vulnerable.
                        long shared too much.
where to rest?
            a heaven? a haven?
                        a saving nest?
i wander,
            a wounded among the many.

weary. deprived. disheveled.
raw.
            downtrodden.
                        long cared too much.
fight, not fight?
            for honor? a victory?
                        a sovereign right?
love, foe love?
               faux love?
                        for love?
i wander,
            a wounded among the many.


:::


Hazel, darling, why did you go?

a duckling to follow a black swan?
i thought you better to follow a fawn.

unfortunate is that promise to care
whose face smiles and wings welcome
delightfully cunning fare.

i watch you follow that swan towards its lake.
while i stand on the bank of mistaken fate.

Hazel, darling, why did you go?

before i bound for the forest
i stand on the bank of a hopeful chorus.

think first, before you fly.

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