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misery, sweet misery.

is it better being this state than
no state at all?

You, the rower of a ship.
me, a paddle. stop doing this!

lift me up and put me in the boat
or cast me adrift. i cannot be between!

misery, sweet misery.

oh and about the other day:

i couldn't move...oxygen...where?
air, air, air. gasping. gulping.

You love-coiling snake!
only a strand of Your hair can do this to me.

what if it was Your entire head?

misery, sweet misery.

:::

my hands are now Your hands.

my lips are now Your lips.

a taste bud, now, on the tongue of Your smile.

my laugh is gone, but Yours remains.

keep taking away.

:::

You are here because
You blew on an ember in my chest.

away for a few days, why go?

i always assume it is my fault.

i still have much work to do with this
back and forth, forth and back again.

even as i write this poem,

You pour wind on my ashes.

     back to the bonfire.

:::

heartbreak is sediment. longing is a river;

take a hammer to sediment,
make it dust.

take a hammer to a river,
make it splash.

:::

night is day.

day is empty.

emptiness is love.

love is nothing.

nothing is longing.

longing is proof.

proof is this.

this is unconditional.

unconditional is essence.

essence is You.

You are me.

me is not.

not is we.

we are that.

that is one.