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unto the new grass
she lay.
unto the new stars
she see.
unto the new colors
she paint.
unto the new way
she walk

while the Past

---forgets to talk.


:::


my heart and my hands are shaking;

orange juice sitting still in the refrigerator
aroused from having "No Pulp"
to realizing it is the pulp kind again.


:::


a real kiss is not felt in the lips.
it is felt in the stomach;

lovers do not experience
pleasure---no---pleasure is a fleeting thing!

both experience something that withstands;
the tension of a 1000 rubber bands;

a multiple-car-crash-pile-up at every touch;
a falling-in that makes gravity tiredly sit down;

a constant surge that tantalizes an ocean tsunami;
an addiction so potent it catches Heroin's bluff;

a grief of Self that gives birth to Us;
a hunger felt that is longing.

...trying to describe it eliminates
some of the starving appeal.

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page 73

the woman said to the pairs of eyes standing around her, I am quite excited for this travel. My clothes are new, my satchel is full, and my shoes are taut and unweathered. can't we accompany you? asked one of the eyes. I am afraid you cannot. You are all nomads. I, however, am an explorer. There is a difference, and I cannot say how one becomes an explorer. whilst the eyes looked around dejected and angry, a young pair of eyes without shoes, hung filthy clothes, and a deprived stomach, moved her hand quietly over her heart. seeing this action, the explorer smiled at the young eyes from the corner of her mouth, sat up, and turned to a new direction to travel. she announced confidently, Do not worry! Some of you will...and have realized... how to truly explore. ::: after magnifying the wings of a butterfly one day, a biochemist nearly lost her head at what she saw; the pigments were segmented into parts. not like feathers, not like
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to lose sense of time looking into their black eyes. must they always be sore with neck pain? purple stamen. dark, royal purple. everything feels lighter in this room; the lamps fess up: We have fewer volts to carry now  because of them. seven yellow faces of God. they proclaim, We never stop faith-ing. ::: other people are simply reflections of you. make wedding vows with those you meet. no! not really! do not be literal, but say this inside: "i met you,   for better or worse. " "i met her, in sickness and in health. " "i met him, till death due us part ." in your mind, marry everyone; make a commitment with everyone--- family, friends, neighbors, strangers. bond wholly; like bubbles on top of bath water,   and divorce any part of yourself that does not serve you anymore. ::: down the river. i am one paddle. You are the other; my face is constantly submerged and choking
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page 69

there are friends who comfort us during the thunderstorm. but then there are friends who comfort us during the thunderstorm--- and shelter us from the rain and cover our ears from the noise and ask us if we are ok after the storm passes. cherish those friends who both experience the thunderstorm and wait until the sky returns to peace. a thunderstorm stands no chance against a lighting-love that strikes before  thunder welds a single decibel. ::: when we convince ourselves we cannot overcome the pains of our past, it is as if we are bees who have punctured ourselves with our own stinging-needle. lying on our backs and crushing our wings, there is a field that is not being pollinated. flowers are starving. their nectar is growing sour. in the midst of our pain, we attempt to fly into water, into a soda can, into anything to help us heal. supposedly, there was such a bee who stung herself so badly she could not even fly from the hiv
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